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tahutoa
tahutoa
Somehow, I think the 'what if I did catch that football' premise is more realistic, too. Really, what kind of grown-ass man with a loving wife and children wishes 'he never existed (mope mope)...' unless he had depression or something and I just didn't know. There's a reason Timmy Turner wished that, you know-- that reason being he's a CHILDISH CHILD, and that's the kind of self-pitying gobshite they self-endorse.
tahutoa
tahutoa
I have no idea what I would do with the knowledge that the world would be better off if I'd never existed, but the thought is absolutely terrifying. Even HITLER made the world a better place by existing (because otherwise we wouldn't have the Geneva Conventions OR the Universal Human Rights papers OR the United Nations).
I really wouldn't want to go, but at the same time, if it would make so many other people's lives that much better, what am I supposed to do?

Especially since, unlike Timmy, I wouldn't have much of an effect on anybody outside my own family. What the fuck else have I contributed? Some MIDIs? A funny YouTube comment, lost among a sea of my infinitely shittier jokes? Like, the fact that everything in life is pointless at the end of the day because we're all dust on the wind anyway doesn't bother me all that much, actually, because I know that you can at least make the best of your time, and find meaning in it all for yourself.
tahutoa
tahutoa
In my case, it's sex (with someone you love in specific, that turns me on so hard), it's watching dudes with sharp wit who are quick to the punch (Frasier, Dr. House, etc.), it's chilling with the friends you do got, shootin' the shit and saying whatever at all comes to mind 'cause it feels good, it's listening to people recount past experiences, and seeing the way that recollecting makes them feel. (I'm probably a better listener IRL than I am online when talking personal experience. Or at least it feels that way? Probably has to do with the lack of live feedback.)
tahutoa
tahutoa
It's also cool facts about shit you might not necessarily be invested in but is cool nonetheless, like how all Pyramids followed a template made of 4 parts (the outer wall, the pyramid, the FAKE pyramid, and the hypostyle hall which had a secret passage to the real Pyramid, which was blocked off if I recall), and that there was always a small, vertical shaft built into a pyramid directly above this one chamber, so the dead person's Ma'at(? I think that's right) could escape after death, or that, to actually build the pyramids, they waited until the Nile flooded during July, then sent log rollers with the huge limestone blocks floating down the river (and presumably to the West of the Nile, since that was Dead Man's Country).
tahutoa
tahutoa
I took a second Adderall and it is REALLY obvious. Especially because I haven't gotten really weird and horny-- I haven't felt my brain shift, if that makes any sense. Has to do with recognizing the different train of thought for what it is, I think. I don't think either of us would be lying if we said we wish we had a girl in our lap, though. SLEEPING, preferably, believe it or not, because then I wouldn't be getting distracted from chiseling this giant tome for you all UwU. Though, if I had my way, I'd probably be in her lap usin' her like a booster seat :3

...it occurred to me while making that last cheeky comment that I've been typing literally ALL of this emotional roller-coaster with a stone-cold look of nothing on my face.

From fear, to despair, to nihilism, to hedonism, to CoOl-AsS fAcTs about Egypt (hang-ten hand gesture), to wanting to both straddle and be straddled by a woman bigger than me, and all with a look of absolute apathy on my face.
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