Neither do I, but if I drink enough syrup I could get 300 pounds and be like bear hugger, the best husbando.
Remember the number 1 rule of being in Canada: NEVER MENTION THAT YOU'RE AMERICAN. We throw Americans in Canada Jail.
Poutine actually sucks (it's existence is a lie spread by the French to keep them from dipping into irrelevancy), but Beaver Tails and all-dressed chips are really good!