PPA Episode 1: A broken Pasta

[hubworld23]

A/N Hi Guys My name is Sammy And I hope you like this chapter for A Mario Fanfic I'm doing called Princess Peach's Adventure! Also for those who are wondering is this A full On Sequel to SMO. Well... Yes and No... Why you might be Asking!?
Yes: Because it takes place after the first game so Some of the Usual Stuff will be there.
No: HOWEVER, Remember that this is Only A Fanmade Sequel, not the Real Deal these are basically My Ideas for One... Did you get That? Also, this is Inspired by the Comic Super Mario Adventures if you are probably wondering where I got the Name from btw Heh...
Well... Even if it's not A Legit & Real Sequel to Smo I really hope you guys do like this first chapter because I Really Really REALLY Worked super hard on it so please try to cut me some slack. I'm doing the best I can Here! Welp, I hope you like this first chapter of PPA I would like to hear what you guys think on it...

4 weeks have passed since Mario once again saved Princess Peach from Bowser from their wedding! With his new friend Cappy!
Princess Peach: Hello Zelda Hello Link Welcome to The Mushroom Kingdom! *She said with A Smile!*
Princess Zelda: Me & Link are really pleased to come to visit you and Mario for a week. *She then turns her head towards Link. Isn't that right Link?
Link: *He nodded*
Princess Zelda: Welp... I'm gonna set up my bags and open them in my room that Link & I will be staying. Anyway, see you in a sec... *She said as she went to the Mushroom hotel to unpack...
Link: *Sigh...* *He said as he took his famous Cap off and rubbed off the sweat due to how hot the Sun was...* *Phew* *He said as he then put his hat back on.*
Princess Peach: *Whistles*
Link: *Turns his head back to Princess and then he Blushes intensely!!!!*
Princess Peach: Ohh Linky come here, Big Boy! *She said with a Naughty Smile... As she then grabbed him and was gonna give him a Kiss...*
Mario: PRINCESS!!!:O *He said with shock!*
Princess Peach: !!! (Please don't be Mario please don't be Mario please don't be Mar...) Ohh... MMMario your back so soon?*She said as she then sweating heavily!*
Mario: Oh Really???! Cuz it looks like your cheating on Me!!! *He said as he then has his Arms crossed in Anger!*
Princess Peach: It's REALLY not what you think *She said as she then turns to Link.* Right Link!? *She said as she then continued to Sweat!
Link: !!! *He then pushes peach away in disgust as he then ran back to her girlfriend Zelda!*
Before anyone says a thing everyone notices a Purple Helicopter as it then came down... The door then opened as smoke appeared from it.*
???: Are you Princess Peach? *It replied in a scary voice!*
Princess Peach: Y-yes... *She said nervously* Why do you ask?
???: I ask because.....
Then the mysterious princess hugged Peach as she then moved back to reveal herself to be alittle bit taller than Peach. Her hair is a little shorter then peach is... As she then straightens her Purple Dress and cleaned up her blue teal crown. As she then puts it back on her head.
Princess Peach: Hello Purpette. *She said Glommenly*
Princess Purpette: Hola Little Damsel... So how are you going with your EX Boyfriend Mario? *She said with a Sly Smug*
Princess Peach: !!! IT'S GOING JUST FINE PURPETTE JUST AOK RIGHT MARIO????! Mario? *She said as she saw him now with Purpette!!!*
Mario: I A can't believe you would do this to me try to cheat on ME???! After all, we have been through Together???? You know leaving me and Bowser on the moon is one thing... BUT THIS??? HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME LIKE THAT?? *He stated as he began to tear up!*
Princess Peach: Mario please you have to understand! I- *She was about to say something but Mario then cuts her Off as he Continues to Speak...*
Mario: OH!!! I UNDERSTAND YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL ME YOU WERE TRYING TO USE ME TO DO IT BEHIND MY BACK!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!!! YOU KNOW A WHAT?? YOU CAN TAKE THIS STUPID LOCKET ASWELL!!! I HOPE YOU AND LINK HAVE A WONDER LIFE TOGETHER!!!! *STARTS CRYING!!!* *Right as he left he smashed the Locket in Anger!!!!*
Princess Zelda: *Stomps on Peach's foot in Anger as Both she & Link then take their Leave!* Come On Link Let's Go!!! *She said as she and Link go to the Mushroom hotel Angerly!*
Princess Purpette: Looks like you gotta choice to make Damsel! Later! *She said as she then took him to leave...*
Princess Peach: MARIOO!!!:O *She shouted as she started to then cry! Ow!*She said as she then rubbed her now Aching Foot due to how hard Zelda stomped on her foot... As she then noticed a Pub with a Familiar Flower Emblem on Top of it... Daisy has a Bar? *She said with wonder* Hmm... *She then hops to the Bar with the working foot on hand as she then hops to the bar as she painfully drags her right foot in the Process...*
To be Continued?

 

[The 3rd Wario Brother]

The peeps here love a good fan work but be sure to put em' in the fanworks section next time

 

[Magma]

Moved to the appropriate section.

 

[The 3rd Wario Brother]

Moved to the appropriate section.

You work fast baby boi

 

[hubworld23]

Hehe... Thx!*Blush*

 

[hubworld23]

The peeps here love a good fan work but be sure to put em' in the fanworks section next time

Well, what do you Guys think of the first chapter So Far?

 

[The 3rd Wario Brother]

Well, what do you Guys think of the first chapter So Far?

I like the idea of someone as well liked in universe as Peach to have her friends mad at her but Mario being mad at Peach flirting definitely seems... Out of sorts for these two.

Maybe if you eased us more into the conflict rather than just Zelda and Link show up Peach flirts and Mario freaks like that I could buy it but it just feels off beat to me.

I do think having Peach looked down upon gives her room for characterization that is sorely lacking in the actual canon and having Peach earn back respect from her friends i could see make me appreciate her in a new way. Like I assume everyone just likes her from birth because she's the princess but actually seeing her EARN respect like you'd expect a political figure to do could make her feel more like a princess and less like a plot device.

Your fanfiction is no lie fanfiction-y but your descriptiveness lends well to potentially good writing

 

[hubworld23]

I like the idea of someone as well liked in universe as Peach to have her friends mad at her but Mario being mad at Peach flirting definitely seems... Out of sorts for these two.

Maybe if you eased us more into the conflict rather than just Zelda and Link show up Peach flirts and Mario freaks like that I could buy it but it just feels off beat to me.

I do think having Peach looked down upon gives her room for characterization that is sorely lacking in the actual canon and having Peach earn back respect from her friends i could see make me appreciate her in a new way. Like I assume everyone just likes her from birth because she's the princess but actually seeing her EARN respect like you'd expect a political figure to do could make her feel more like a princess and less like a plot device.

Your fanfiction is no lie fanfiction-y but your descriptiveness lends well to potentially good writing

I Agree! I really should have done better with it also what do you mean by "eased Up?"
And I do think it is finally time that Peach gets the Development that she Needs outside of the Bros and Others... I'm glad you like it so Far! More chapters are Coming!

 

[The 3rd Wario Brother]

I Agree! I really should have done better with it also what do you mean by "eased Up?"

I feel like you could've taken more time for the characters conflict to grow and they start to get mad at Peach over time. This just feels like something everyone involved overracted to save for Link.