Dr. Mechano
a-gonna ween
Wario has been on many adventures over his long treasure-hunting anti-hero career. And each of these end with Wario bringing home riches to add to his ever-vast hoard of wealth. So I thought it’d be interesting to take a quick retrospective, and look back on all of Wario’s earnings over the years.
(Note: Due to games having multiple endings, I will usually* go with the best possible ending as the canon result.)
*One exception is Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3, since it’s clear that the castle ending is the canon one, not the “perfect game” result of Wario getting his own planetoid.
Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3
Over the course of Wario’s adventure on Kitchen Island, he amasses a huge collection of coins and treasure. In the end, though, he cashses all of his earnings in - every last coin - to buy his dream castle, which would become a long-standing location in the franchise.
Full tally from Wario Land:
Virtual Boy Wario Land
If Wario gets all the treasures of the Awazon River Basin, he uses them to unlock a mighty vault on the basin’s surface, which is absolutely loaded with coins. He also takes home a magic carpet and a genie bottle - the latter of which, we’ve yet to see him use. Once again, the treasures themselves are not kept by Wario, but are traded to get the game’s actual prize.
Full tally from Virtual Boy Wario Land:
Wario Land II
Wario’s own treasures - marked as three specific bags - are stolen from him by Captain Syrup. Wario gives chase, and not only gets his own treasure back, but snags a bunch of other treasures and coins along the way. Despite Wario Land II’s branching plot paths, the game’s true final ending rests upon completing all the stages, somehow, which leaves Wario with the following:
Wario Land 3
After defeating Rudy, the citizens of the Music Box World graciously offer Wario all the treasure he found along the way. If he found everything, this totals out to:
Wario Land 4
Once Wario defeats the Golden Diva, he packs up all the treasures he’s managed to salvage and escapes the crumbling pyramid. If he’s collected everything, this leaves him with:
Wario World
The premise of Wario World is that the Black Jewel has turned Wario’s Castle into a chaotic abstract world, and turned all his treasure into monsters. If Wario rescues all of the captured Spritelings, they are able to restore his castle to its former glory. As best as I can tell, Wario does not actually gain new wealth in this game, and the best ending simply has him avoid being worse off than he was before. So all he ends up with is:
Wario: Master of Disguise
In this game, Wario constructs the TELMET, a device that lets him enter the reality of TV shows. Wario hops into the world of The Silver Zephyr, a show about a phantom thief who steals lots of treasure. By the end of the game, Wario is granted the treasure hoard of the Cannoli clan, but there’s just one hitch… he can’t actually bring the treasure back through the TV. None of the treasure Wario finds is of any monetary value in the real world!
And yet, Wario still doesn’t leave this adventure empty-handed. If Wario’s rank increases (based on the amount of loot he procures in the TV world) to the max level, he receives a Wario statue in his actual real-world living room. He also receives an extra statue for collecting all of the TV treasures, and another for defeating one of each type of enemy. Where these statues come from is unclear. Perhaps viewers of the show were so impressed with Wario’s antics that they had monuments constructed of him? Nevertheless, while it’s one of his lesser hauls, his final tally ends up being:
Wario Land: Shake It!
Similarly to Wario: Master of Disguise, Wario’s goal in this game - the Bottomless Coin Sack - is snatched out from under him by Captain Syrup during the game’s ending. Unlike Master of Disguise, however, Wario still ends up with all the treasures and wealth he’s accumulated in the Shake Dimension, and still comes home richer than he was when he left it. Even though the prize he really wanted was taken by someone else, in the end, Wario still ends up with:
Final tally for all Wario Land games:
This is the first time I'd really given much thought to exactly how much Wario's brought back from his adventures, so it's neat to put some real concrete numbers to it. Not a bad haul from eight treasure-hunting adventures, I'd say!
Now he just needs to get out there and bring home even more treasures and coins!
(Note: Due to games having multiple endings, I will usually* go with the best possible ending as the canon result.)
*One exception is Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3, since it’s clear that the castle ending is the canon one, not the “perfect game” result of Wario getting his own planetoid.
Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3
Over the course of Wario’s adventure on Kitchen Island, he amasses a huge collection of coins and treasure. In the end, though, he cashses all of his earnings in - every last coin - to buy his dream castle, which would become a long-standing location in the franchise.
Full tally from Wario Land:
- Wario Castle.
Virtual Boy Wario Land
If Wario gets all the treasures of the Awazon River Basin, he uses them to unlock a mighty vault on the basin’s surface, which is absolutely loaded with coins. He also takes home a magic carpet and a genie bottle - the latter of which, we’ve yet to see him use. Once again, the treasures themselves are not kept by Wario, but are traded to get the game’s actual prize.
Full tally from Virtual Boy Wario Land:
- Huge sack of coins
- Magic carpet
- Magic bottle
- All the other coins he collected along the way
Wario Land II
Wario’s own treasures - marked as three specific bags - are stolen from him by Captain Syrup. Wario gives chase, and not only gets his own treasure back, but snags a bunch of other treasures and coins along the way. Despite Wario Land II’s branching plot paths, the game’s true final ending rests upon completing all the stages, somehow, which leaves Wario with the following:
- Recovering his own stolen treasure
- 50 new treasures
- Captain Syrup’s secret treasure, obtained after piecing together the secret treasure map
- All the coins he collected on the way
Wario Land 3
After defeating Rudy, the citizens of the Music Box World graciously offer Wario all the treasure he found along the way. If he found everything, this totals out to:
- 100 treasures
- 200 Musical Coins (worth 10 coins each, a value of 2,000 coins)
- All the coins he collected along the way
Wario Land 4
Once Wario defeats the Golden Diva, he packs up all the treasures he’s managed to salvage and escapes the crumbling pyramid. If he’s collected everything, this leaves him with:
- 12 treasures
- 17 CDs
- All the coins, crystals, and diamonds he’s found along the way
Wario World
The premise of Wario World is that the Black Jewel has turned Wario’s Castle into a chaotic abstract world, and turned all his treasure into monsters. If Wario rescues all of the captured Spritelings, they are able to restore his castle to its former glory. As best as I can tell, Wario does not actually gain new wealth in this game, and the best ending simply has him avoid being worse off than he was before. So all he ends up with is:
- Restoring his castle and the treasure/coins he already owned beforehand.
Wario: Master of Disguise
In this game, Wario constructs the TELMET, a device that lets him enter the reality of TV shows. Wario hops into the world of The Silver Zephyr, a show about a phantom thief who steals lots of treasure. By the end of the game, Wario is granted the treasure hoard of the Cannoli clan, but there’s just one hitch… he can’t actually bring the treasure back through the TV. None of the treasure Wario finds is of any monetary value in the real world!
And yet, Wario still doesn’t leave this adventure empty-handed. If Wario’s rank increases (based on the amount of loot he procures in the TV world) to the max level, he receives a Wario statue in his actual real-world living room. He also receives an extra statue for collecting all of the TV treasures, and another for defeating one of each type of enemy. Where these statues come from is unclear. Perhaps viewers of the show were so impressed with Wario’s antics that they had monuments constructed of him? Nevertheless, while it’s one of his lesser hauls, his final tally ends up being:
- 3 Wario statues
Wario Land: Shake It!
Similarly to Wario: Master of Disguise, Wario’s goal in this game - the Bottomless Coin Sack - is snatched out from under him by Captain Syrup during the game’s ending. Unlike Master of Disguise, however, Wario still ends up with all the treasures and wealth he’s accumulated in the Shake Dimension, and still comes home richer than he was when he left it. Even though the prize he really wanted was taken by someone else, in the end, Wario still ends up with:
- 99 Treasures
- 40 CDs
- A solid-gold garage (Prize for collecting all treasures)
- All the coins and diamonds he collected along the way
Final tally for all Wario Land games:
- Wario Castle
- Magic carpet
- Magic bottle
- 261 Treasures
- Captain Syrup's Secret Treasure
- 200 Musical Coins
- 57 CDs
- 3 Wario Statues
- Solid-gold garage
- ...And an uncountable number of coins, crystals, and diamonds
This is the first time I'd really given much thought to exactly how much Wario's brought back from his adventures, so it's neat to put some real concrete numbers to it. Not a bad haul from eight treasure-hunting adventures, I'd say!
Now he just needs to get out there and bring home even more treasures and coins!
