Post a Joke
- Thread starter JoeKarta
- Start date
What do you call a cow with no legs?
GROUND BEEF!
(DON'T EXPECT FOR THE CRAPPY JOKES TO STOP.)
GROUND BEEF!
(DON'T EXPECT FOR THE CRAPPY JOKES TO STOP.)
Why did the cyclops close his school?
Because he only had one pupil!
Because he only had one pupil!
A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar.
The bartender says,
"I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
The bartender says,
"I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
Some moar dark humor just cuz I like it.
- How do you recognise a gay couple in Iran?
- Hitler was actually a good guy. Think about it: of all people, he was the only one who managed to kill Hitler.
- I was in church yesterday, and I saw somebody smoking a cigarette in church. This shocked me so much that I accidentally dropped my beer bottle.
That one made me laugh
The very meaninglessness of life forces man to create his own meaning. Children, of course, begin life with an untarnished sense of wonder, a capacity to experience total joy at something as simple as the greenness of a leaf; but as they grow older, the awareness of death and decay begins to impinge on their consciousness and subtly erode their joie de vivre, their idealism – and their assumption of immortality. As a child matures, he sees death and pain everywhere about him, and begins to lose faith in the ultimate goodness of man. But, if he’s reasonably strong – and lucky – he can emerge from this twilight of the soul into a rebirth of life’s elan. Both because of and in spite of his awareness of the meaninglessness of life, he can forge a fresh sense of purpose and affirmation. He may not recapture the same pure sense of wonder he was born with, but he can shape something far more enduring and sustaining. The most terrifying fact about the universe is not that it is hostile but that it is indifferent; but if we can come to terms with this indifference and accept the challenges of life within the boundaries of death – however mutable man may be able to make them – our existence as a species can have genuine meaning and fulfillment. However vast the darkness, we must supply our own light. ―Stanley Kubrick
What? did you expect a joke? Oh, okay.
Why did the chicken cross the road, to get to the other side!
What? did you expect a joke? Oh, okay.
Why did the chicken cross the road, to get to the other side!
The very meaninglessness of life forces man to create his own meaning. Children, of course, begin life with an untarnished sense of wonder, a capacity to experience total joy at something as simple as the greenness of a leaf; but as they grow older, the awareness of death and decay begins to impinge on their consciousness and subtly erode their joie de vivre, their idealism – and their assumption of immortality. As a child matures, he sees death and pain everywhere about him, and begins to lose faith in the ultimate goodness of man. But, if he’s reasonably strong – and lucky – he can emerge from this twilight of the soul into a rebirth of life’s elan. Both because of and in spite of his awareness of the meaninglessness of life, he can forge a fresh sense of purpose and affirmation. He may not recapture the same pure sense of wonder he was born with, but he can shape something far more enduring and sustaining. The most terrifying fact about the universe is not that it is hostile but that it is indifferent; but if we can come to terms with this indifference and accept the challenges of life within the boundaries of death – however mutable man may be able to make them – our existence as a species can have genuine meaning and fulfillment. However vast the darkness, we must supply our own light. ―Stanley Kubrick
What? did you expect a joke? Oh, okay.
Why did the chicken cross the road, to get to the other side!
At first I thought this to be some morbid, pitch black joke about the very nature of humanity, but the chicken one is much more comprehensible and to simple minds like me, much funnier.
My love life
If I told Wario about my love life, he will probably react like in my signature.
Who has two thumbs and likes Wario.
Don't look at me like that! I lost my left thumb in nam!
Don't look at me like that! I lost my left thumb in nam!
In my opinion The joycons suck but the pro controllers are great.
I guess you could say, There is a PRO and a CON to every console.
I guess you could say, There is a PRO and a CON to every console.
Don't you hate it when you suffer from epilepsy, and your friends chuck their dirty laundry in while you're taking a bath? I hate that...
Have you ever eaten African food? Neither have they.
If Hitler would have been a feminist what political system would he have come up with?
A dickhatership!
A dickhatership!
How do you call a large cult? A religion.
How many idiots does it take to change a light bulb? Three: one to hold the bulb, and two to turn the ladder.
There are three kinds of people in the world: people who can count and people who can't.
How many idiots does it take to change a light bulb? Three: one to hold the bulb, and two to turn the ladder.
There are three kinds of people in the world: people who can count and people who can't.
What is christianity's favorite cereal?
Christ Krispies.
Christ Krispies.
Black comedy is like food: not everyone gets it.