So Wario walks into a bar..

Did this change your life?

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    Votes: 5 31.3%

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His mom, staring at him saying: You have opened the chest that was once my prison!

Wario forgot he had a mom, so he...
 
Picked her up and shaked her in hopes of any treasure or money falling off of her and after realizing she had none, threw her aside. Disappointed at the lack of treasure, he uses the mysterious device again and was then teleported to...
 
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Captain Syrups ship where she was in the middle of eating her breakfast, pancakes (with syrup ;)). he proceeds to set it on fire cause he doesn't like syrup.
 
...then, Wario escapes the fire by riding off on the ship's boat (the small rowboat attached to Syrup's ship). After paddling for a while, Wario looks behind him... Captain Syrup is swimming towards him at full force, completely pissed! Wario remembers he has some garlic under his hat, so he...
 
...wolfs that shit down, but the lifeboat is accidentally snapped in two by his garlic-enhanced girth. Panicked, Wario then attempts to...
 
Eated the stinky garlic and his belly bloated to 4x the normal size, completely swollen with flatulence. He then farded the most devastating and vile fard, directly at cptn. Syrup, blowing her over the horizon and then twinkling like Team Rocket. The flatus propelled Wario's dingy all the way to shore, making landfall at...
 
Crescent-Moon Villager said:
Eated the stinky garlic and his belly bloated to 4x the normal size, completely swollen with flatulence. He then farded the most devastating and vile fard, directly at cptn. Syrup, blowing her over the horizon and then twinkling like Team Rocket. The flatus propelled Wario's dingy all the way to shore, making landfall at...
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Coney Island, where he proceeded to make his way to the hotel shaped like a giant elephant. His curiosity piqued, having learned while majoring in novelty architecture that this building had burned down in 1896, Wario decides to check in, ignoring the tingling in his 'stache that signaled bad vibes. He pauses to gaze up at the canopy atop the Elephantine Colossus, watching how submerged spotlights shone upward, casting an eerie blue glow on the building. He ignores the chill passing down his toned back, and continues onward, pushing the iron gate open, not knowing about the hired gun waiting for him within. Upon ringing the service bell, up pops the person working the front desk.

"Hello." Their face was obscured, but despite the coverings on the person's face muffling their voice, and the reflective goggles they were wearing, he felt like they were trusty-- more so than he, anyway. "I can check you in, but don't ring the bell anymore, people are trying to sleep upstairs."

Wario nodded, seeing as how his compliance would make pilfering their valuables all the easier-- security couldn't be too tight, this building was supposedly ancient history after all...
 
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tahutoa said:
Coney Island, where he proceeded to make his way to the hotel shaped like a giant elephant. His curiosity piqued, having learned while majoring in novelty architecture that this building had burned down in 1896, Wario decides to check in, ignoring the tingling in his 'stache that signaled bad vibes. He pauses to gaze up at the canopy atop the Elephantine Colossus, watching how submerged spotlights shone upward, casting an eerie blue glow on the building. He ignores the chill passing down his toned back, and continues onward, pushing the iron gate open, not knowing about the hired gun waiting for him within. Upon ringing the service bell, up pops the person working the front desk.

"Hello." Their face was obscured, but despite the coverings on the person's face muffling their voice, and the reflective goggles they were wearing, he felt like they were trusty-- more so than he, anyway. "I can check you in, but don't ring the bell anymore, people are trying to sleep upstairs."

Wario nodded, seeing as how his compliance would make pilfering their valuables all the easier-- security couldn't be too tight, this building was supposedly ancient history after all...
Click to expand...
...the guards did The Mario and froze to death due to the extreme weather freezing their bladders and spreading to their bodies.

Wario made his way into the building and shoulder bashed a guard, shattering him into pieces. Wario had killed a man.

Wario then knew what he had to do, escape from the crime scene. But first he swiped all of the treasure he could and stuffed it all in the trunk of a Prius that fell out of the sky. He then drove off to...
 
Commendedzuez09 said:
Mario and Luigi's home.
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Where he proceeded to place and activate a bunch of those proximity mines that Jango Fett lays down in Lego Star Wars. He then preens his mustache villainously, dragging two fingers along the length of one side once, twice, three times, while laughing all "myaa-haa-haa-haaaa...."
 
tahutoa said:
Where he proceeded to place and activate a bunch of those proximity mines that Jango Fett lays down in Lego Star Wars. He then preens his mustache villainously, dragging two fingers along the length of one side once, twice, three times, while laughing all "myaa-haa-haa-haaaa...."
Click to expand...
But Wario thought of the consequences associated with this and decided not to do it knowing he'd be in the electric chair. So he...
 
RevampedSpider said:
But Wario thought of the consequences associated with this and decided not to do it knowing he'd be in the electric chair. So he...
Click to expand...
Forgoes the mustache preening and simply watches from the bushes.
...eventually, a door opens.
"Nice of the princezz to invite us over for a picnigay Lui--" The mines begin to rapidly pulsate, making a "ch'kkhee??" sort of sound!
BOOM!
LEGO STUDS FLY EVERYWHERE!
"Wah ha ha! Now to collect them all before he respawns!" Wario said, then, holding down the R button.
 
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